HEARTACHE

To Moving On

Art and Quote by Unknown

My heart aches

At the thought of having to give up.

They say you only become a failure once you decide to give up.

But nobody talks about the times in which you had to give up

For the sake of your sanity,

For the sake of your dignity,

For the sake of still coming out whole.

What if I tried everything

To keep our love alive;

To deepen our intimacy and intention;

But to no avail?

I’m only met with resistance.

I’m only met with excuses.

I’m only met with a lack of effort.

I’m only met with a lack of consideration.

I'm only met with a lack of accountability.

Or maybe ... their own trauma

Mixed in with their naive understanding of love and respect

Limited their ability to love me the way I needed to be loved--

The way I deserved to be loved.

Maybe they really did give all that they could

And it just wasn't enough for me.

Did I give up too soon?

Am I still a failure for not trying to meet them halfway?

Or am I triumphant for letting go of a losing battle?

Am I triumphant for knowing my worth?

Am I triumphant for respecting my boundaries?

Am I triumphant for understanding that it shouldn’t be so hard for someone to value me? To love me correctly?

Am I triumphant for choosing me?

The answer is yes … to all of those things.

I am triumphant.

I am not a failure at love.

I embody love.

I embody patience.

I embody grace.

I embody passion.

I embody selflessness.

I embody resilience.

I embody softness.

I know when to say enough is enough.

I'm just still learning to stand strong in my conviction.

And so my heart aches

At the thought of having to move on;

At the idea of our “love” not being strong—

Just a crazy infatuation that never had the true capacity to grow into something more …

Into something real and of substance.

But I do know this:

I made the best decision for me.

My future self will thank me for putting myself first;

And there will be better days,

For this too shall pass.

My heart may ache now,

But one day it will be full and at peace.

I will be ready to love once again

And my heart will ache no more.